


From Whence She Came

by rosepetalrevolution



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Angst, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Character Death, F/F, Family Feels, Gen, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-06
Updated: 2015-01-06
Packaged: 2018-03-06 10:31:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3131285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosepetalrevolution/pseuds/rosepetalrevolution
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a full life with Haruka and her Senshi family in Crystal Tokyo, Michiru senses that her time is running out.</p><p>From a same-prompt group challenge in which each author needed to explore how either Haruka or Michiru would deal with the other's death.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From Whence She Came

It wasn’t a vision, but rather the vague sense that some invisible force was pulling her away from this world that visited Michiru as she fixed her coffee one crisp Saturday morning. She’d expected it for a while now, given everything that had happened. Looking out from the kitchen to the leather couch where her wife and their daughter lounged, Michiru smiled; if this was to be her last day in this realm, she would savor the beauty and love that surrounded her. Haruka in her sweatpants, slung low on her narrow hips a few inches below the bottom hem of a worn and softened tee shirt. The light in Hotaru’s eyes as she watched the science program that played on the screen in front of her – for a girl so young and incomprehensibly intelligent, the teenager’s curiosity had never abated. The sunlight that filtered in through the high window on the far end of the living room, with the Sakura in the backyard casting fluttering shadows. The scent of the coffee, the warmth of its mug on her hands. Michiru noted it all, and was thankful.

“We know so much more about the vast expanses of our universe than we ever have before, in part due to the efforts of the diplomatic and scientific teams that have officially represented Earth since the early years of our new millennium.”

“Mama, hurry, it’s you” Hotaru cried gleefully as Haruka sat up straight on the couch, creating a space between them for Michiru’s small frame. Indeed, images of the two ambassador Senshi, accompanied by scientists hand-selected by Ami and interacting with delegations from faraway worlds, appeared on the television as the narrator continued his explanation of their work. As Hotaru beamed with pride at her parents being featured on such an important broadcast, Haruka and Michiru’s eyes widened as image after image appeared on the screen. The blonde blushed deeply, and her wife pressed her hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle; while the people of Crystal Tokyo could never know the stories behind the pictures of their missions, Haruka’s embarrassment over the shaky beginnings of her diplomatic career had not faded much over the years. What the program thankfully failed to show were the gaffes the young soldier had made when meeting the delegation from 51 Pegasi, the time she had bent to one knee and addressed the handmaiden of Beta Pictoris rather than the actual queen, her reaching to pet a citizen of Mau – how could she have known that her usual greeting for Artemis, Diana, and Luna was considered incredibly disrespectful on their home planet? As more photographs appeared on the screen, Haruka could only pray that there would not be any reference to their early meetings with those now widely known as the Sailor Starlights, closest allies of Crystal Tokyo and Earth.

“I… Would anyone like more pancakes?!” Haruka exclaimed desperately, standing and walking out to the kitchen briskly. Michiru smiled – her partner had long ago improved upon her diplomatic skills and no longer had any reason to be embarrassed by her younger years. Michiru had actually always been drawn to the moments when Haruka’s bravado was cracked open, revealing the deeply human core that, for better or for worse, was usually hidden away from those who could not get close. Leaving the youngest of the Outer Senshi in the living room to finish watching the program, Michiru crept out to the kitchen and found Haruka leaning over the stove.

As she wrapped her arms around the taller woman’s waist, Michiru reveled in the ways that the scents of cologne, fabric softener, and breakfast food had mingled on Haruka’s skin. “Come on now, Ruka. You cut such a striking figure in all of those old pictures. I’m sure it reminded everyone of how handsome you once were.” Haruka slowly turned to face her, eyes narrowed at Michiru’s sarcasm, but a small grin spreading across her lips. “Yeah, it’s really a shame that the years have been so hard on us,” she replied, brushing a lock of hair from Michiru’s face, hair colored as the brightest blues of the sea, shimmering with highlights of turquoise and sea foam, hair that only she knew had begun to grow in white like cresting waves. While Michiru was diligent in dyeing her hair, Haruka had long ago come to like the streaks of silver that now peppered her short style – they only added to her devil-may-care aesthetic, and she had found that they drove the younger women of Crystal Tokyo wild. As the only Senshi, perhaps even the only denizens of Earth, who had begun to show outward signs of aging, the duo had initially feared the loss of their beauty and youth. It made sense, after all - the years of galactic travel, prolonged periods spent outside of the range of the Ginzuishou’s powers. They’d always known they were the vainest of the Senshi, so their unique experience with the passage of time had once seemed a cruel irony, a punishment for their former insolence… but that was before they realized just how well they wore their age. After a few hundred years of looking like twenty-five year olds, Haruka and Michiru had actually come to welcome the change, reminding all they encountered of the long-forgotten beauty of aging gracefully.

A slow kiss pressed soft against her lips, and Michiru rose up on her tiptoes to meet Haruka’s mouth, pulling her closer with the knowledge that her wife would hold onto these last moments forever. Silently, Haruka seemed to understand, holding Michiru tight and nuzzling her cheek. Setsuna had been gone a long time, now; her self-imposed isolation at the Door of Time was a conspicuous, if premature, coping mechanism. Her two dearest friends pretended to hope that Hotaru wouldn’t have noticed, despite the impossibility of such a happy accident. From the living room, the TV announcer’s voice boomed, signaling the end of the program.

“Though we have discovered far more of this galaxy than we had ever dreamed possible, there is still much that remains a mystery– new dimensions and countless universes wait to someday be explored by those who are brave enough to face their infinite unknown.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Quietly, Haruka closed the door to Hotaru’s room. She and Michiru had not tucked their daughter in at bedtime for years, but there had been nothing awkward or strange about doing so this night. Even when there hadn’t been something hanging in the air, Haruka thought, she should have made more of a practice of saying goodnight to the teenager, wise beyond her years and full of love for the family she had never expected. Taking Michiru’s hand, Haruka led the way to their bedroom.

As she unzipped her wife’s dress, Haruka looked back on the perfect day they’d shared. An impromptu performance in the nearby park’s band shell for a few families with young children, a drive along the coast, an anniversary party for Makoto and Ami that had been filled with dancing and Minako’s jokes and a cake Mako baked to surprise Ami and the Queen’s unfettered laughter. The day seemed to encapsulate all the sweetness of her extended lifetime, but Haruka knew that there was only one reason for this. She had spent it with the love of her very long, sometimes difficult, always exciting life; the woman who had saved her from herself so that they could save the world; her muse and her goddess, the one person she knew she could never live without.

The couple was silent as they prepared to turn in for this evening, both watching the words they needed to say and the moments they had to say them slip through their shaking fingers. Michiru put on her favorite nightgown and slowly brushed her flowing hair. Haruka paced in their bathroom, not noticing the blood that had begun to trickle from her gums as she brushed her teeth with distracted force. Finally, the silence was broken.

“Haruka, come out here please,” Michiru said in little more than a whisper, her voice quavering so slightly that no one other than her partner would ever have detected it. Haruka sighed, returned her toothbrush to the cup on the counter, and slowly walked back to the bedroom.

Michiru sat on the end of their bed and calmly gestured for Haruka to join her. Gritting her teeth and staring at the ground, the great warrior obliged as the lump in her throat refused to be ignored. A gentle, manicured hand lifted her chin, and her watery dark blue eyes once again felt at home gazing at the stunning turquoise of Michiru’s. Haruka began to open her mouth to apologize for not keeping her cool when Michiru had hardly betrayed her fears, but the hand beneath her chin had risen, and one finger pressed gently against her lips. The hand moved again, slowly tracing its way over her strong jaw, reaching back to the nape of her neck, as another found its way to her hair. Michiru’s lips grazed over her lover’s cheeks before finding their place on her mouth. Michiru’s breath caught in her throat, and the gentle hands turned forceful, gripping her lover with no intent of ever letting go.

“Haruka, I’m so sorry,” the small woman sobbed into her wife’s chest. Haruka abandoned her self-control, tears flowing from her eyes as she wrapped herself around Michiru’s quivering body, her mind searching aimlessly for words that could even come close to describing her feelings.

Suddenly, Michiru stood, leaving Haruka dumbfounded on the edge of their bed. “You have to promise me that you’ll be brave,” she cried angrily, her resentment clearly directed at the universe rather than her partner. “You have to promise me that you’ll take care of Hotaru! That you’ll take care of the Queen!” Michiru had stopped crying as though a clarity of purpose had returned to her thoughts, like their duty and mission remained at the forefront of her mind. Slowly bending to her knees between Haruka’s parted legs, she took her great love’s hands and kissed them softly. “You have to promise me that you’ll let the others take care of you,” she whispered, and looked up at Haruka’s face with the same expression she had worn the first time they’d held hands, all those centuries ago.

Haruka reached down and gently pulled Michiru to her feet. It was appropriate now, she thought, that Michiru stood above her, always inspiring her to reach for the heights of her greatness and her goodness. Through tears, she smiled up at the woman who surpassed all others in her grace and beauty, who had chosen a rough-around-the-edges kid to be more than a comrade in their duty to protect Earth, to be a lover and a parent and a partner through all the days of her life. Haruka chuckled softly and decided to kill the mood by sniffling loudly; the intensity of Michiru’s gaze broke and she could not help but giggle, reaching for the tissue box on the dresser.

“Don’t you worry about me, baby,” Haruka said with an exaggerated tone of inflated confidence, “I’m as tough as they come. Hell, I’m the toughest soldier this galaxy’s ever seen!” Michiru had begun to smile as she wiped the tears from her eyes, “Of course you are, how could I have insinuated otherwise?” Haruka’s strong arms hoisted her up, and slender legs wrapped around a slender waist. “Just don’t tell Mako or Seiya,” the blond whispered between kisses, “this old body can’t handle any more championship fights against those young in’s.” Their foreheads pressed together, Haruka reached to turn out the light and carried Michiru to bed one last time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haruka dreamed that she walked alone down a darkened corridor, the click of her boots on the polished stone floors echoing off vaulted ceilings. Stained glass windows filtered a dim a light on either side of her, depicting scenes of the battles she had fought so long ago. As the floor faded to a starry nothingness, Haruka saw a limp body laid in front of her, a tattered blue skirt and shattered set of goggles barely visible amidst the bloodied and mangled limbs. Resisting the urge to vomit, she scooped Ami into her arms, silent tears sliding down her cheeks as she kissed her friend’s cold forehead,diverting her eyes from the exposed bone of Mercury’s shoulder. Looking out upon the empty space ahead of her, Haruka was horrified to find each of her friends in the same state: white leotards stained red, hair and skin burnt, her own pulse and breath the only movement. As she slowly placed Ami back on the ground, Haruka looked up to see the floating corpses of her Queen and the King, just as they had been lifetimes ago, when she had failed to protect them the first time. A laugh echoed around her, deep and sinister, familiar and frightening. Drawing her sword and mustering the courage to continue past Serenity and Endymion, Haruka approached the source of the horrible sound, who may have once been human but had long since lost the soul that characterized that species. A tall, shadowy figure stood before her as the bloodied bodies of Setsuna and Hotaru appeared to Haruka’s left and right, draped upon crosses, lifeless and limp.

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Haruka snarled at the laughing figure. She wanted to kill this murderous bitch, to avenge those she had loved the most, but as soon as she had shouted her question, the soldier of the skies wanted nothing more than to turn and run, run as she should have those countless years ago, away from duty and love and the pain of death and war. A light shown down upon the perpetrator of these crimes, and Haruka gazed upon herself, carrying Michiru’s pristine but inanimate body. “You couldn’t save them,” this Haruka spat back at her, a flash of rage in her eyes. Michiru’s body turned to sand, scattered on a harsh wind that raged between the two living soldiers. Identical swords clashed and the seasoned fighters mirrored each other’s movements. Perhaps this battle would rage on forever…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Michiru’s sleep was shallow and choppy, mirroring both her breathing and the sea that had always given her its power. Her dreams appeared as nothing more than quickly-fading vignettes, fuzzy and blurry images without sounds. She saw an empty stage with a spotlight shining down on nothing in particular. The familiar view of the Crystal Palace grounds from the passenger seat of Haruka’s red convertible splayed out in front of her, yet she could not turn her head to catch one last glimpse of the driver. Then an official government gathering, with the King and Queen in their finest ceremonial clothes and the Inner Senshi standing guard behind them. The Queen’s mouth moved slowly as she addressed the crowd, the King clutching her right hand and the Princess grasping the left. Fade to black… and now Setsuna at the Door, staring blankly into the Garnet Orb as though she could see something inside it, but Michiru had never known it serve as a window to another place or time… now she felt the bullets pierce her body once again, though the dreams like this had ceased long ago. Haruka’s terrified face stared up at her, but Sailor Neptune continued to stagger forward through the pain, just as she had when they’d been young and naïve… Except this time, she could not reach Haruka. Something was pulling them apart, and Michiru felt the scene, Haruka, and herself fading away, anguishing at her failure to save the one she loved the most…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She woke slowly, called forward from her slumber by the song of birds outside the window. Neither woman had wanted to set an alarm the night before, as to do so would have forced them to acknowledge that their last night together in this world could not last. Blinking to adjust to the sunlight streaming in, she inhaled deeply, and stretched her arms above her head.

Panic set in, and Michiru realized that she was alive. Still lying on her side atop the large, fluffy bed, she froze and considered her surroundings and her options. This was indeed their bedroom. She had full sensation throughout her body. All that should have been assuring was wrong, and Michiru wondered how she could have misinterpreted the recurring visions and yesterday’s unmistakable feeling – while it had been much more peaceful, it was the same sense she’d had the two times before. What would Haruka say when she woke to find her alive? Haruka…

Michiru noticed that the body pressed against her back was still. “No,” she whispered, eyes shut tightly in a refusal to take in any further evidence of what she realized had happened. Slowly, her hand crept down to the arm that lay across her stomach, separated from her skin by their down comforter. Haruka’s skin was cold against her fingers, and Michiru’s tears fell hot upon her face.

She couldn’t tell how much time she allowed to pass before rising from the bed to look at her lover. Haruka’s eyes were closed, but her mouth was curled into the small smirk she’d always worn after they’d triumphed together in battle. She’d gone in her sleep, with Michiru in her arms, silently victorious against whatever final villain had been foolhardy enough to challenge her. Incapable of any further tears, Michiru stood over the bed and stared with nothing but a dull anger inside of her. Hadn’t Haruka been the one who had called her selfish, so long ago?

Sighing and shaking her head, the Senshi of the seas released her anger as a moment of clarity came to her seer’s mind. She reached into her dresser and pulled out two sealed envelopes, leaving a third in the drawer; the letters inside them were no longer entirely accurate, but they would convey everything that was necessary. She laid the papers on the dresser’s surface and bent to pick up the dress she had worn the night before. Slipping back into it, she zipped the back up as far as she could on her own and then turned back toward the bed. Haruka was already halfway tangled in the sheets, making her job a bit easier.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rei had been awake for hours, completing her chores around the shrine that the Queen had thankfully been able to save when she established Crystal Tokyo. Though the space was a bit melancholy without her grandfather, Minako and Artemis had helped fill the void. Now she sat in front of the holy flame, searching for answers to the questions that had riddled her sleep the night before. Violet eyes flew open as an image was made clear amidst the flame. Jumping to her feet, Rei ran to wake Minako. There wasn’t much time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hotaru wandered into her Mama and Papa’s room, though she did not expect to find them there. She was keenly aware of what yesterday had been, and though it weighed heavily upon her that their time together had come to an end, she lingered amongst the memories of the previous day, the previous decades, the hundreds of years that she’d been blessed with as a member of this family. Sure enough, she found a pair of letters on the dresser. She picked both up and headed to the living room, dropping the one addressed to Setsuna on the coffee table and settling into the worn leather couch to read hers.

My darling daughter, my greatest pride,

There is little left to say now that I have not said over the last nine hundred years. Keep strong for your papa and your mama. Never falter in your duty to your Queen. Never fail to tell your Princess how much you love her. Remember that you’ve always been the bravest of all of us.

We both know there will be a day when we meet again. I pray that day does not come for a long, long time. But it will be the greatest joy of my next life to hold you in my arms once again.

You will always be my little girl, one of the three brightest lights that have guided me through this life. It was a sweet one because I was able to share it with you.

You will have my love forever.

No signature was necessary. Michiru’s script had always been distinctive in its soft elegance, and her words were limited to only those that conveyed exactly how she felt. She had not been that way with everyone, and Hotaru had long considered it a privilege to receive nothing but honesty from her mother. The young woman shed no tears, but felt a tugging inside herself. Existing at the axis of life and death was now more difficult than ever before, and the young soldier longed for her Princess, the one who could always pull her back to the side of life.

Rather than turning to walk out the front door and up to the palace, however, Hotaru was drawn to the large windows that looked out upon the sea behind the now-empty house. Her eyes grew wide as she recognized her mother, very much alive, barefoot on the sand. In her arms was a large bundle wrapped in cloth…

Leaving the door swinging open behind her, Hotaru ran as fast as she could across the lawn. From the corner of her eye, she spotted Mars and Venus leap from treetops alongside the house. But as though an invisible force compelled them to come no further, all three soldiers stopped at the place where the sand and the sea met, looking out at Michiru, who had waded into the waist-deep water. With her back to her friends, her family, she placed Haruka’s body gently into the sea, and the tide swelled around her. A great wind picked up and the sky darkened as though Michiru had called a typhoon. Minako screamed out after her, but Rei grasped her hand tightly as the waves swirled high, obscuring Michiru completely but never crashing upon the shore. Lightning flashed and the wind howled, but suddenly the sea was calm. Light returned to the sky, and the birds began singing once again. There was no sign of Michiru, no sight of Haruka’s body, no trace of the white sheet or the dark blue dress. The three soldiers remained, unable to comprehend what they’d just witnessed. A gentler breeze swept through the trees, carrying a few petals from the Sakura’s flowers out over the sea. While Minako and Rei watched on in silent disbelief, Hotaru laughed through her tears. Haruka-papa would have been so pissed that they weren’t roses.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the Palace, the Queen and Princess sat together for breakfast, laughing quietly as they discussed the happenings of the previous night’s party. Though the Queen loved all of her guardians, a few undoubtedly stood out as her closest confidants and companions beyond their official duty. Haruka had always been such a dashing dance partner, and the teenage Princess grinned as she teased her mother that she’d better be careful, lest Sailor Neptune stage a mutiny. As the two royals giggled over toast and tea, they heard the distinctive rhythm of a soldier’s footsteps in the corridor. Slowly, the door to their chamber swung open to reveal the Guardian of Time, returned to Crystal Tokyo after having disappeared for months. Though she could hear her daughter’s gleeful cry of ‘Puu!’ from behind her, the Queen’s heart sunk. Rising to greet the majestic soldier who bore tragic news, she fought to maintain her composure. For so long, the Queen had been given no reason to cry, but the pain she felt in this moment was far worse than it had been when she’d watched the two soldiers die for her centuries ago, back when they were all still children. The passage of time had not made such occasions easier for the majestic ruler, and she collapsed into Pluto’s strong arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As she had waded out into the sea, Michiru reflected peacefully on a fight from her youth, long buried in her memories of a time when their missions had been filled with destruction and sacrifice instead of diplomacy and peace-keeping. “You would have destroyed the world to save her?!” the possessed man had cried out, looking up at Michiru from the ground. She had fully believed her answer then – that a world without Haruka wasn’t worth saving. Now, though, after centuries of life with Haruka and mere minutes of life without her, she realized how naïve she had been. As the cool water surrounded her and the breeze picked up the ocean’s salt, she thought of the friends that would soon arrive, and of those who would hear the news later. She thought of her daughter, who would soon see her mother for the last time. She thought of Setsuna, and how she wished they could have comforted her as she waited for them to die,knowing so much more of the truth than she could ever reveal. This world, whether Haruka was in it or not, deserved saving. Michiru was simply no longer the soldier to save it. “It’s so unfair, Haruka, for you to leave me here alone,” she whispered before closing her eyes and returning her soul to the element from whence she came.


End file.
